FroYo YOLO

What a Summer it has been! Torrential rain for weeks on end, then a heat wave, and now 100% humidity all the time. Just a truly pleasant and enjoyable time for all!

Everyone has their own way of creatively beating the heat. Keeping ice packs around their necks, not wearing shirts, not wearing pants, not wearing clothes at all….

But keeping cool as an underemployed 20something can sometimes be difficult. As I hear from many of my friends, they don’t have enough money to leave the air conditioning running all the time, but with the air off they can’t bear to cook in their apartments. And since they can’t cook food and they don’t have any money to eat out, what is a 20something to do!?

Well, as always, I have all the answers.

(hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.)

The answer is: Frozen Yogurt.

Some people have very strong feelings about frozen yogurt. Many are obsessed, others are disgusted, and some have never even heard of it (who these people are I don’t know. Are they living under a rock? Is it cool under there? If so, can I join? I’ll bring the froyo.) I, for one, loooooooove frozen yogurt. I only like the plain yogurt flavors though and use my toppings to make up in the flavor department. Here are my tips for getting the most out of your frozen yogurt experience when you are PAS (Poor-As-Shit.)

Caroline’s Tips For Getting The Most Out of Your Frozen Yogurt Experience (Or, Any Food Experience Really)

1. Make the most out of your toppings.

It’s really easy to go topping crazy when you’re at a frozen yogurt store. You see so many fun things! And you want to eat them all! The trick here is to eat them when no ones looking. Yup, I really just said that. Obviously don’t shove your hand in the bowl and eat right out of it, but rather, use the tongs to put the toppings on the frozen yogurt and then eat them from your cup while you’re waiting on line. Also, be very particular about the toppings you choose. You may think you want those cheesecake bites, but are they really going to taste good with those gummy bears? Throwing toppings around willy-nilly can become expensive, so take your time and think about it. Also, don’t be afraid to ask for tasting cups. That way you can eat lots of frozen yogurt before you actually make your own cup, thereby filling you up and helping you spend less money.

2. Get a rewards card.

I don’t usually like signing up for rewards cards or giving my emails out to stores because I’m very much a private person (though you wouldn’t know it from this blog.) But occasionally I will sign up for a card with a store because I don’t need to provide any information and I’m able to rack up points each time I’m there and redeem them for actual merchandise or food. Last time I went to get frozen yogurt with my best friend she found out she had earned TEN DOLLARS on her rewards card! You know how much free frozen yogurt she could get with that kind of money? (A lot is the answer.) Plus they often give out extra points for birthdays and holidays. The last time I was in the store the cashier said I had earned extra points because I hadn’t been there in awhile and they “missed me.” SCORE.

3. Flirt with your cashier.

This may be a controversial tip, but I’m telling you from years of experience that it works. I have been on both sides of the register as a customer and as a cashier and I can tell you a little flirting never hurt anyone. Oftentimes when I am at work I’m dealing with terrible, awful, inconsiderate, rude people that make me question my faith in humanity and I hate having to give them what they want when they don’t deserve it. So when an adorable boy comes in and flirts with me a little bit, I’m way happier to help him out. Even if I don’t give him an actual discount (because I’m not really allowed to do that) I can definitely give him tips on the best time to shop or when to come back and get discounts. And as a customer I can not tell you how many times I’ve simply been nice (literally just been kind) and a fellow has given me stuff for free. Some of you are probably rolling your eyes at this, but I am rolling in free frozen yogurt and cookie dough bites so HA.

4. Pay with change.

So far all of these tips have pretty much required having no shame. But the key to being a successful underemployed 20something is having no shame. No one else cares, so why should you? Which is why paying with change is such a wonderful thing for us underemployed folks to do. Don’t worry about going to a machine which is going to charge you money to convert your coins into bills; just go to the cashier and pay with the coins! Yes, it might annoy the cashier, but it’s legal tender and technically they have to take it. I can’t tell you how much money I’ve saved up over the years by picking up change off the street or in fitting rooms etc. People  just leave change sitting around because it’s heavy to keep in their wallets or it’s annoying to have to sort through. But, if they’re willing to leave it lying around, I’m going to take it and shamelessly pay for all my frozen yogurt.

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